Mig 
Greengard's ChessNinja.com

Kirsan Slogan Contest!

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The fine folks (for all I know) at chessanytime.com have put up some photos from around the Olympiad. They include one of Ilyumzhinov's reelection pavilion (of course, access to the area to build such a thing was limited, but hey, what's one more abuse at this point?) What really stands out is Kirsan's new logo. It's the modest and nonsensical "KIRSAN + ♥ = FIDE". I love a rebus, but really, this is it? It wasn't enough to rip off a Queen song for his slogan, and a mediocre Queen song at that? Did they not even consider "We Are the Champions" or "Fat-Bottomed Girls" for a slogan? "Kalmykian Rhapsody"?

I'm sure we can do much, much better here. But we are lazy, and have not (yet) been offered an envelope full of cash for our services to FIDE. So allow me to incentivize you. The best new Kirsan slogan rebus to come in in the next 48 hours will win immortality, wide distribution in Khanty-Mansiysk, and your choice of a couple of signed books I have lying around here. Post a link to your submission. If your Photoshop skills aren't up for it, just write it out in the comments and I'll put it together if it's genius.

Allow me to kick things off with a few obvious ones.

51 Comments

LOL Ah, Mig, those are priceless! ;)

Kirsan + Cash = Election

Russell Miller, Vancouver WA USA

Could we get one like:

FIDE [minus] Kirsan [plus] [clean-cut Mormon-looking dude, age 40ish, upright-looking] [equals] [smilie] ?

Actually, I kinda like the two in the main post and advise distributing BOTH of them in tandem.

How much could 10,000 of each sticker cost? Not much. And make them SCRATCH AND SNIFF for effect. What smell? Dunno, but I love those and keep them.

I second that: Kirsan + Cash = Election

But also make the cash smell like freshly-printed cash, and the pic of Kalmykian pesos.

'Alien plus heart equals Kirsan' made me smile. 'FIDE minus Kirsan equals smiley face' made me laugh out loud!

On the Olympiads: Yemen seemed to have defaulted on purpose against Israel. Most likely a politic move. Such a decision, which has been taken by different countries in past olympiads, should lead to automatic expulsion. How can the "gens una sumus" stands to this? Countries should be allowed in the olympiad only if they state that they will play against any country. If they default on this agreement, then bye bye from tournament, and a fine, in whatever form.
Good to see you back, Mig, btw.


Qirsan times square root of MC (squared) = SciFiDE

How about this:

[chess figure] King turned over on a chess board, with the slogan

"Kirsan forfeits on VOTES"

something like this quick draft:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jRkAGowTnE

maybe somewhere a subtle "FIDE wins" finds its place as well...

Ah nuts, Russell beat me to it... lol

Kirsan + Empty pockets = Dissolving chess board

Option A
+ = 1
FIDE - Gens et alienus una sumus

Which might well mean "We and the aliens are one people".

Option B
+ + + = "I am Kirsan of FIDE - Resistance is futile"

Bah, my my "images" were interpreted as tags and hidden. Let me try again. This time with square instead of angled brackets (and preview):

Option A
[People holding hand across globe] + [happy alien waving from flying saucer] = 1
FIDE - Gens et alienus una sumus
Which might well mean "We and the aliens are one people".

Option B
[Kirsan] + [gun] + [money] + [Borg spaceship] = "I am Kirsan of FIDE - Resistance is futile"

can't do dem fancy graphic things but kirsan's solution to every chess problem is to get the c rook to b1

Random thought:

A sticker should capitalize on the fact that Karpov is so much more a handsome man than Kirsan...

Karpov looks evil, conniving but always smiling as though he lives life in great fun. Probably with multiple side-mistresses - I'm sure of this - his grin says so.

For a person like me, a U.S. citizen - I always vote for the better-looking candidate, because I know everyone in my government is a puppet of the banksters regardless.

In such a vote, looks count for something.

How about Kirsan + criticism = dead people

(maybe not a good way to recruit for the other side, but it's a closed ballot?)

Kirsan + Ground Zero = Zero [squared]

{or}

Karpov - Kirsan = FIDE

{or}

Karpov + FIDE - Kirsan = Sanity

{or}

Kirsan = Kaos

I think it's still Kirsan's own version that captures it best. All you need to do is substract "Kirsan" from both sides of the equation and you get it right: FIDE-Kirsan=[I love it]

Kirsan = Ballots stronger than bullets.

A photoshop of Karpov standing nonchalantly on a Dallas lawn as JFK's car whizzes by.

Alien [+] Kirsan [-] Brain = FIDE 1995-2010

Ilyumzhinov >>
"Karpov was a world champion 30 years ago. Now he's just a pensioner sitting at home."

oooh.. whoah

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/profiles/kirsan-ilyumzhinov-chess-came-to-earth-from-outer-space-2085838.html

Let's try these two, if they work (and sorry about the width!!!):

Hmm.... looks like the comments section cuts out html tags, to directly post the images. :(

Sooo.... let's try this:

http://laughingvulcan.org/kirsan3.png
"Kirsan + FIDE = Deep + (Katmandu - Cat - Man) ^ 2"


http://laughingvulcan.org/kirsan3a.png
"Kirsan + FIDE = Moves only a Fool would make..."

OK... one more. Not so much a rebus but a sort of iconic art:

http://laughingvulcan.org/kirsan4.png

(Man... I must really have nothing much to do, or am that much a whore for a signed book. :O ;) But I amuse myself, anyway. :D Am I the only one who consistently mistypes a "png" extension as "pgn"?)

FIDE - Kirsan = Chess (smileyface)

If you guys don't implement my scratch 'n sniff sticker idea I want my taxpayer share of the $4 million back...

Even by migloid standards pathetic and childish ....

I’m not joking. A psyop isn’t necessarily designed to work on you, Andy, a logical chess player, but upon group numbers.

Who would accept a slip of paper? A few.

How many a sticker? Many more - all children and a few adult.

And a scratch 'n sniff sticker? EVERYONE. EVERY G_DDARNED GRANDMASTER IN THE HALL CARLSEN KRAMNIK DOWN TO THE WEAK BUT CUTE WGMS WOULD PUT SNS TO HIS/HER NOSE FOR A SNIFF OF PINE LINEN. ESPECIALLY THE GIRLS.

And even if KCKG lose in a week, all those Kirsan SNS on frigs may tell in a future election... it's called strategic propaganda...

Beautiful, Arjon -- the second one.

Besides Mig's contributions, I like Arjon's algebraic formula the best.

Meaning, of course, the one with the follow-up equation of FIDE - Kirsan = heart.

The same algebraic conclusions, and more, are up on this English blog: http://streathambrixtonchess.blogspot.com/2010/09/i-khanty-mansiysk-get-enough-of-your.html And funnily enough I pointed it in an e-mail a day or two before Mig started the contest. The point isn't that I was first to spot it but just that it's such a blatantly obvious point that it once more makes you wonder about the people behind the Ilyumzhinov bid. Of course all the free gifts they give out at their stand might outweigh the fact that most of the people seeing their slogan will laugh...

The Karpov camp should erect a stand nearby with a large sign giving each of the various algebraic conclusions:
Kirsan + Love = FIDE
FIDE - Love = Kirsan
FIDE - Kirsan = Love
That would amply illustrate the stupidity... no, the truth of Kirsan's slogan!

An alien (E.T.) in the Uncle Sam pose (pointing at the viewer) with the slogan: "I want YOU to vote for Kirsan!"

Amended: add the requisite top hat with black and white vertical stripes with "FIDE" in white on the black stripes. Ummm...yeah...tasty!

...which could - borrowing/stealing from a classic Rod Serling Twilight Zone, "To Serve Man" - result in something like
Kirsan + Alien = To Serve Chessplayers

So, Mig: any winners in this contest...?! Inquiring minds/greedy chessplayers want to know...or should we wait 'til after the political shuffleboarding (between K & K [& K]), so you can think a li'l more clearly...?!

Based on a short story of the same name by a master of the twist ending, Richard Matheson, although more famous for his novels: "The Shrinking Man" and "I Am Legend".

Oh man! Too tired! I knew I was wrong as soon as I posted..."To Serve Man" was of course a Damon Knight short story (also a giant of classic science fiction). Sorry for muddying the waters.

While Serling wrote original screenplays for most of the Twilight Zone episodes, he also wrote screenplays from the works of noted authors. Very few, if any(?), episodes were written by the original authors.

Not that it's a bad thing, just sayin' ...

CO

Now that he has won...

Kirsan you all.

Guess Mig's still recovering from the political football game [FIDE presidency], since it's been a couple of weeks & no word of any contest winners (or updates about the Olympiad that just ended, for that matter...!).

Mig, how're you doing, brother?! Hope all's well...

See the "tweet" top right! Perhaps Mig didn't manage to take just the right amount of vodka for optimal blogging - it's a fine art :)

Im glad that Kirsan won , chess showed that deserves someone like him at the top , it is also nice to see the 3 K's and their little helpers losing to someone who wouldnt qualify for a job at mcdonalds.

Mars Attacks creature + Text:
I am FIDE (And So can You !)

Hey, I didn't know that Steven Colbert was a chess fan/player...!?

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    This page contains a single entry by Mig published on September 21, 2010 6:24 PM.

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